Tag Archives: waiting

[love is a losing game]

I’ve been thinking this for some time,
mainly due to a song by Amy Winehouse,
but mainly because it is how I feel at
the mo.

If i was to describe myself, I would
say that I was a hopeless romantic.
I have the habit of holding one girl
above all others.

I do actually believe in love and
that when you find that person
there will be an amazing story behind
it. Like how you met or how it was
an uphill struggle but you both knew
it was meant to be.

But, my problem, and this is a
consistent problem that I have had
from about the age of four is that
I tend to pick girls that I have
little or no chance with.

Which has meant, that because
of this particular single mindedness
I have missed opportunities with
some lovely people. Things that
could have become something
special.

But instead I used silly
excuses and fake numbers to
get them out of my way. This
all dawned on me recently, is
a stupid thing to have been doing.

So I have decided [and I’m going
to try and keep it like this] to stop
waiting for something that 9.5/10
times doesn’t pan out in my favour.

The fake numbers and excuses stop
now. I shall encounter all that come
my way.

Because when it comes to me and
my emotions I’m guessing that a
lot of the time I’m just kidding
myself anyways, so what’s the
point of waiting for something or
someone that most likely doesn’t
feel the same.

So, I’m stopping the romantic me for
a while.

Oh well.

[i carry you in my heart]

Is it worth settling?

I would like to clarify, by ‘settling’
I am not talking about ‘settling down’
with a family, thats a different blog
for a different day.

What I mean by settling is in reference
to when we settle, as to, make do.

I have been considering this recently,
do I settle for what has come along or
do I wait even longer for what [in my
mind at least] is perfect for me.

As chidren we are taught [mainly by
films and telelvision], that what [and
some cases all] we want is just
around the corner, our dream job,
our perfect partner, all of our goals
attainable if we hang on to the belief
that if we wait little bit longer it will
all come along for us.

But is it worth it?

I mean life isn’t like the movies or
television and it’s not like we have
forever to be messing around. So
why do we waste time?

On the other hand, it’s hope. Hope
that we will be rewarded for our
sacrifices and patience. And sometimes
we are. And of course alot of the time
we are not.

A little story from personal experience,
I  waited once, waited for quite some
time. And then gave in and gave up.
Simple as that, moved on. And you
know what. Kind of annoyed I did,
that I didn’t have the patience.

This blog seems to be going on a bit.
So I shall summise, people wait, wait
for that special thing. But must also
ask themselves why they are waiting,
what is it that is holding them back
and what is it that has them scared.

What is it that stands in your way?

[one day it will all become awesome]

As people we spend alot of time waiting.
Waiting for that perfect life or romantic
situation to appear. The thing about
waiting is that you hardly find yourself
risking anything.

Most of the good things in life, or the
good things that happen in life or
have happened are the direct result
of taking a chance.

Now, I’m not talking, the rolling of
a dice chance, I’m talking about
taking that chance that scares you.
Usually, the more it scares you
the greater the rewards. And if
you take the time to think about
it, you’ll realise I’m right.

So why are people stuck in a rut?

Why when what I just said is
common knowledge are people
seeming to be taking less and
less chances these days. The
answer for this?

Fear of consequence my dears,
fear of consequence.

It’s a shitty truth, but it is a truth
none the less, and as I sit here
in front of my laptop I wonder why
I myself am in said rut and what
I am gonna do to get out of it.

Fuck all is what I’m gonna do,
at least for the moment, life is
OK, and I have no reason to change
it, but, saying this I am liable
to do something soon. All because
of a Bloc Party lyric. As silly as
it sounds. The lyrics is from the
song called ‘Waiting For The 7:18’

“If I could do it again, I’d make more
mistakes, I’d not be so scared of
falling. If I could do it again I’d
climb more trees, I’d pick and I’d
eat more wild, blackberries”

I don’t wanna feel like that when
I’m thirty.