Tag Archives: redundancy

[constans cacosomnia]

Now when I was informed that I would be
being made redundant. A few thoughts
crossed my mind. The obvious being that
it kinda sucks but another thought was that
my days would switch around again.

To put in basic terms, when I have no reason
to get up at a particular time, then the same
reasoning says that I don’t have to go to sleep
at a particular [or any] time. Which has now
resulted in my days becoming my nights
and my nights becoming my days. I go to
sleep at 6:00am and wake up at 3:00pm.

Now, it has it’s uses, as I find that I am
more productive at night. I’ve been reading
more and getting my bedroom wall covered
in photographs of friends and family. Past
and present. It’s nice.

But the trouble comes when I do need
to awake at a socially acceptable hour. Like
I have to on Wednesday. And I need to reverse
the affect on my internal body clock.

This is done by staying up all thorough one
night and only going to sleep at about 6:00pm
that day before you have to be anywhere. The
body [my body that is] generally sorts itself
out after that, and everything is OK. Except
that it is so much effort I might just risk
oversleeping to be honest.

The title of this blog, in case you were wondering
is Latin. And it roughly translates into ‘constant
sleeplessness. Quite fitting I felt.

[i want to go home, i want to go home]

The title of this blog is actually the line I was
repeating to my boss from about ten past six
to seven today [it didn’t help, because I left
at seven which is the time I was meant to be
working] and this is because at about ten to
five today I completely lost the will to work
anymore. So you can understand that by
about six I was really going insane.

As mentioned in a previous blog, I am being
made redundant and by that I basically mean
that by no fault of my own I won’t have a job
come the 19th of July this year [next month
basically] and at first I took this as a laugh [as
I tend to do] but it is actually getting more and
more apparent.

Now I know that the amount of people at
work who have ever read this blog are
small and the percentage of those few
that read it to begin with who still do is
pretty much zero. So I can be totally honest
if I feel I want to. And I do.

And the truth is that I will miss everyone
there a great deal. Because the truth about life
is, when I go the chances of constantly hanging
out with this [quite diverse and incredibly
interesting] group of people goes with it.
Because as we all know, once you leave a
school/college/workplace you don’t really stay
in touch with the friends you’ve made in these
places unless you live quite close. Which, I’m
afraid to say I do not. And coupled with the fact
I find it incredibly hard to stay in touch with
people will inevitably come out a negative result

I have been taking up things to distract me
from these thoughts as they swirl and swirl
around my head, like taking up piano again
or looking to start [actually] writing a
novel/short story. But it does all come back
to the fact that everything about this sucks.

It really does.

[wasted days you’ve come to pass]

Today in my shop I had a visitor, a
friend of mine. This does happen usually
but this is a person who I don’t see that
often.

So as we exchanged pleasantries and the
‘how have you beens’ the conversation
took a turn. To the best of my memory
it went like this

“So how are you?” She said

“I’m ok thanks, you?” I said

“I’m good, how’s work?” She replied

“Same old same old, you know”

Right there, that’s where for some reason
I automatically lied. Because the thing is
I’m being made redundant and sometime
in July I won’t have a job any more.

Feels odd to write it, oh well. These things
do happen. Especially in an economic
recession, they do seem to always happen
to me though. I’m keeping a good mood
about this. Yeah.

On a more positive note I’m still not
drinking alcohol. Which seems to have
led to a slight weight loss and my disinterest
in girls [in the romantic sense] is still going
on. Although it did make my friend think
I had become homosexual. Two friends in
one day. Go me.