Tag Archives: bluewater

[i want to go home, i want to go home]

The title of this blog is actually the line I was
repeating to my boss from about ten past six
to seven today [it didn’t help, because I left
at seven which is the time I was meant to be
working] and this is because at about ten to
five today I completely lost the will to work
anymore. So you can understand that by
about six I was really going insane.

As mentioned in a previous blog, I am being
made redundant and by that I basically mean
that by no fault of my own I won’t have a job
come the 19th of July this year [next month
basically] and at first I took this as a laugh [as
I tend to do] but it is actually getting more and
more apparent.

Now I know that the amount of people at
work who have ever read this blog are
small and the percentage of those few
that read it to begin with who still do is
pretty much zero. So I can be totally honest
if I feel I want to. And I do.

And the truth is that I will miss everyone
there a great deal. Because the truth about life
is, when I go the chances of constantly hanging
out with this [quite diverse and incredibly
interesting] group of people goes with it.
Because as we all know, once you leave a
school/college/workplace you don’t really stay
in touch with the friends you’ve made in these
places unless you live quite close. Which, I’m
afraid to say I do not. And coupled with the fact
I find it incredibly hard to stay in touch with
people will inevitably come out a negative result

I have been taking up things to distract me
from these thoughts as they swirl and swirl
around my head, like taking up piano again
or looking to start [actually] writing a
novel/short story. But it does all come back
to the fact that everything about this sucks.

It really does.

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[museum day is fast approaching]

On the 18th of May it is International Museum
Day, a random fact for me to give you I am
sure, but hey,

http://icom.museum/imd.html

I’ve got a busy few days ahead of me, I’ve got
to go out tomorrow night. Which although
is nowhere near the norm I do believe it will
go on until the morning hours of Saturday
morning.

Then I have to go to work. This is making
me giggle while I write this because it’s
been a while. Then I have to try to get out
of work early. Because straight afterwards
I’m going to Brighton. Top fun. Lucky I have
Sunday off hey.

I’m actually looking forward to Brighton as
well because I haven’t been in ages, like two
years methinks.

Recently I was tidying my room and came
across a novel I was yet to read thorugh and
then I found another, and another, and
another so I decided to list them. I have to
read 23 books with a page count over 7000.

This is going to take forever, good thing
I like reading so damn much, or maybe
it’s the buying books side of it? =]

[no boat nor bridge, or crucifix can hold me back]

Today, at work, my friend Andrew
and I were standing about on the
shop floor. It was a quiet time, where
there were no customers and little
to do.

So obviously we fill the time with light
hearted conversation. During which he
turned to me and said

“It must be fun to be you”

“How so” I replied

“To not have a care in the world”

To which I replied with a quick remark
of something or other and carried on
with the day, but like most things that
people say to me recently it does not
sink in straight away. It waits in the
back of my brain for a few hours and
then hits me full force in the face whilst
my mind maybe contemplating other
menial things.

If we were to look at another example of
how my mind is slow but powerful. I was
walking around Bluewater Shopping Center
last Tuesday where I happened to happen
upon a friend of mine. I asked if I could join
and she said yes. Now as we were walking
around and I was doing my usual habit of
trying to fit as much information about as
much as possible in the little time that I had.

About fifteen minutes into this, whilst she
was sitting enjoying a cigarette she looked up
and said;

“Richard? Does it scare you that we’re adults?”

“Not at all Steve, it’s an adventure” is all that
I could come out with. But whilst I was on the
bus ride home. It started to sink in. I’m an adult
now, does this mean that the fun is over? That
the time spent absent mindedly was wasted?

Not at all, although since that conversation
it has scared me slightly to realise that I’ll
soon be 22 [22? fuck]. I’ve got a plan, as loose
as it is, I have a plan. Come the middle of August
and that when I’ll start the travels. Europe will
become my bitch. Till then I have to stop the
travels otherwise I’ll be stranded.

It’s annoying that Steve can still get into my
head, haha
.

[am i going downtown for halloween]

[fuck no, I’m going uptown with my
best friend Tommi]

[this is what I wore last year and I’m
thinking of doing it again this year,
but better]



[i’m also going to photoin an awesome
band, oh and if you were wondering
who i am amongst this lot, i’m the guy
in the bloodied up lab coat]

[more eye make up and blood this year
me thinks]

[actually to be honest, i’m going to
uptowns downtown, but hey, it’s
better than downtowns uptown]

[oh oh oh, and i forgot the awesome
bit, i may actually get to wear it at
work 2morrow as well] [this is awesome
to me]

[on a train, with decent conversation]

Nowadays I live a good ten minute bus
ride from where I work, i get up, roll out
of bed and boom I’m at work [well not
literally, but you get the idea]

But this was not always so, I used to
live a good two hours from work. This
includes train times and buses [and the
waiting] and usually I would go to sleep
on the train and be happy when I woke
up at my appropriate station.

Only once or [at a push] three times
waking up three stations too late. Now
this just popped into my head but I didn’t
fall asleep all the time and most of these
times I was bored, my music the only thing
keeping me company and watching the same
stations approach day in and day out.

[why not choose a different line you ask?
well I was on a schedule and I didn’t wanna
fuck it up]

So one time it was worse than usual, with the
ability to randomly make myself go to sleep
lost and my iPod battery dead [I had fell asleep
listening to it the night before, a habit I don’t
believe I will ever grow out off].

I was forced to just sit there, and as I was
staring out of the window, noticing a burnt
out car aside the track. And I actually wrote
a poem in my notepad, it went like this;

I’m on the train, still
The fun has worn off
And the sheen has become dull

I wrote this poem in my notepad [it’s
not that great a poem, but I was quite
bored at the time and had nothing for
inspiration, ok, excuses over, back to
the story]my ears pinged as they had
caught attention to a conversation
happening on the group of seats to my left.

Now all I remember is that it was two old
gentlemen and they were dressed in ragidy
[spelling] clothes. They discussed all manner
of subjects to the state of the UK to how
they had felt about their lives. But it was the
last thing that one of them said that actually
hit me in a strange way. So much so, that I
actually got out my notepad to jot it down.

Now at this point the train had got to Dartford
station and one of the old gentlemen got up

“See you later Les, take care”

“It’s a bit late for that”

“Yeah…”

And like I said at that moment I got my
pencil out and wrote it in my notepad.
Now to hear an old man say this was
actually quite depressing in all honesty.

It popped in my head cause I was flicking
through my notepad, funny the randoms it
contains.

[quotes 3]

“The only thing I do online dear is the washing”

Elderly Customer of Andrews
Jessops, Bluewater
2008

[14th December 2007]

Now, before I simply copy and paste this
entry from my old livejournal I feel that
I should explain it somewhat. This journal
entry depicts in a sort of first person veiw
one of the best days of my life.

I intent to erase my old livejournal, now
that I have this blog instead, but I also
feel that there are a few blogs worth
saving and they will pop up randomly
in this one before I take the final plunge
and delete the last one.

– [it all starts on the 12th December 2007]

[this for all intensive purposes is you]

So picture the scene, it’s
about 5:20 on a normal
Wednesday, you’ve got ten
min left of work and your bored.

You’ve already had to deal
with customers whose orders
haven’t arrived, helped people
and displayed an almost autistic
knowledge in photography.

And on top of that you’ve been
told that sleeping in the same bed
with someone who you work with, and
nothing happening is impossible,
and that you probably got raped
in your sleep, nice.

But as you stand in the hallway, out
the back of the shop, feeling the seconds
slowly drip away, but still getting nowhere
nearer to home time
you feel your pocket
going off, its your phone,
its a message, but not the one
you were hoping for, but its
still a nice surprise, you read:

Ricktron50002
Wana come drink some beers
round mine? x

a smile appears
you say yes [quite obviously]
and your assistant manager
asks what it is that suddenly perked
you up, and successfully guesses
its strongbow realted, you chuckle as
you grab your coat to leave, its
no longer home time, its drinking
time, its the promise of good times
[except you do have to pop home first
to grab some stuff].

You get to the train station
a little later than planned to
find out that your train is delayed, by
quite a bit, there’s nothing
you can do either, so you decide to
get a cab to Dartford and get
a train from there.

Whilst waiting for the taxi,
a train goes past, the train you
had been waiting for, you start to
run get halfway and realise you
won’t make it, you have a short
conversation with a man
on the platform with you and
proceed to go and wait for the
taxi again.

In this time you
talk to a girl who seems to be
milling around, you say uyo’d
split the cab if she
was going to Dartford, she isn’t,
shes going to Bluewater, but you
get thanked and talk for a bit anyways,
talk about this and that, and she says
that she’ll come visit you in your shop,
you don’t expect this to ever happen.

You get to Dartford station and
give up £7.50 to the cabbie
with the itchy back and
proceed to get on a train.

You get to New Cross and find out
all the delays were because of a
fire at Cannon street station, it’s
nine o’clock, your really late, on
the way to ricks house you
buy some alcohol and cigarettes
you give up 5p of your change,
your in a rush.

You get to the house, the hall light
is red, you giggle, this place looks
like a brothel, you think to yourself,
you get in, bearing the gifts, not
only the fags and booze, but a delayed
birthday present for rick and the photos
from France, of which you and him
visited earlier in the year.

You proceed to drink, discussing many
things, also putting up the Christmas
lights in the kitchen,
that were supplied by ricks
flatmate Kate, it is awesome, the lights
look amazing.

You again proceed to drink and
wake up on the house sofa, remembering
parts of the night before, long talks
about how you should accept gifts and
what not, talks on ricks movie idea
which is amazing, your life and its
comparisions to your drinking buddies
life, discussions on the universe whilst
laying on your back in the garden on bin
liners as to not get your clothes dirty
you also see that you have
been a silly boy, sending drunken text
messages again, was and is always a bad idea,
oh well, doesn’t matter much, cause you
have to get to work, you brush
your teeth and leave a note for rick
and head for New Cross station.

You get to the station a few minutes later
and get a ticket from the automated
machine ‘NEW CROSS TO GREENHITHE’ it states,
showing you, that you can go no further,
you don’t mind, you need to go to work and thats
it, you wait, it is now 09:01 according to
the printed date on the ticket, you
check and your in luck, there is a train
to dartford, its due for 09:11, you get
to platform C and find its delayed by about 10
minutes, which is ok, it leaves you more than
enough time to get a bus and to work,
your so tired and cold and you receive messages,
replies from the night before, you reply, and
wait for the train.

It comes, it doesn’t stop, it just goes on,
this is the first time its happened to you,
you have to think, think…
you’ve got it, you jump on the next train to
Lewisham and then the next train from there
to Darford, as you leave Dartford station, you
hand the guy your ticket and start to walk,
your already late and you get stopped,
theres something wrong with your ticket mate,
you hear behind you.

you turn around, saying pardon in the
process, well according to this, he says,
your going to new cross, and its yesterday,
in your haste you gave him the ticket
from yesterday, you quickly grab
the ticket you got this morning, and
hand it to him, saying sorry at the
same time, he says that he doesnt have
to keep it since its valid for a few more stops

you say you don’t really care
and you cant wait for that train
and you leave, and get the Fasttrak B to
Bluewater, you call your boss to let him
know you’ll be late, and you start your
journey to work, getting in a little
bit of sleep and thinking that although
all you did last night was have a few
beeeers round a mates house, it was
awesome, oyu had a great time, and sleep
is fun, work flies by, you see your best friend
and some people you havn’t seen in years,
you work a little bit extra because you were
a little bit late, which allows you to chat a bit
more.

After work, you start to head home, your tired
and have a great idea for a blog, it may be long
winded but it’d be fun to write and thats he point,
you grab a helium balloon and head to Bluewaters
christmas fare, you see you say hi to mark
and kelly sends us away because we are being
too rude, in this time, you manage to maintain a
convo whilst using a urinal and [albeit not at the same
time] manage to accidentally insult a burgerking girl,
neither you or mark know how this happened, you apologise,
grab your coke and leave, you and mark proclaim to be gay
just to get some sales people
to leave you alone, and then you
return him to the christmas fayre and after a while continue
the journey home.

You get home, say hi to your mum
and get on the computer, it was
on standby when you got in, and
you rest your laptop on your lap,
and begin to write your new blog
recounting the previous two days
in a strange sort of way, but you
are happy writing it.

You talk to alex online for a bit
and realise that you don’t know where
your laptop charger is, its been
moved since Tuesday when you
last used it, and its flashing 10% battery
left.

So you put the laptop to sleep and
look, you realise that this blog will
take ages, and you tell alex this,
you find the charger, it had been moved,
you not too happy, but its nothing to get
stressed about, you have you dinner and
have a bath, you then continue to write
as you finish up, you
realise your quite proud with it and the
clock on your laptop says 00:36.

Its time to post and sleep
you log onto livejournal and go to
post to journal, realising you have a
message, which you’ll read in a moment,
you open the notepad document where you
pre-wrote the blog, a habit you
seem to now always do, to write the blog
in notepad first and then place it in
livejournal, just in case.

You select all the text by pressing
CTRL or as you say ‘central’ and the A
key, you then copy it and you are about
to paste it into livejournal, adding a
little bit on the end which would have
been impossible to write, and you add a series
of tags to it, add some details and realise
it is ready for posting.

POST

awesome, yeah?

awesome, yeah?

[word count : 1542 words]