Tag Archives: blogging

[i am starting a new notepad, alert the press]

It is actually kind of a big deal, to me that is. The story is that from 2008 to
2010 [thereabouts] I always carried a small pocket notepad around with me
to write down any poems, thoughts, etc that would pop into my head that
I wouldn’t want to forget. I had fill about one and three quarter notepads
when I just stopped and I can’t really remember why to be honest.

When I moved back home I shoved all my notepads, loose pieces of paper
and so on into a messenger bag that I wasn’t using any more. I, at the very
least, am able to explain why I wasn’t using the bag any more, the basic
reason behind that was because I had used it nearly everyday for three
years and it was falling apart, but I couldn’t bear to throw it away so I
found a better use for it. You should always have a bag to put all those
loose pieces of paper. But I digress.

As I looked through my old notepads it occured that all those thoguht would have been lost had I not jotted them down first. I was still writing things down but on scrap pieces of paper that usually got lost. So I popped down to Paperchase and bought a notepad. I intend to fill this one up with random musings and what not and I might end up scanning some of the pages.

In other news today I am cutting my hair, which might not sound like much but I’ve been letting it grom for over two years now. But it’s time to let it go. Below have a look at what my hair looks like at the moment

[it’s an old Facebook profile pic and ok, my hair is mostly covered by the
hat, but I’m sure I look good in the hat]

I think I do this every other year, sort of an apprehensive resolution to sort my life out as it were. I don’t think my life is too bad to be honest but there are always areas where one can improve. I think for me, I lack concentration at times and I am unable to focus on one task for too long but that can lead to a bad habit that will last a lifetime, so it’s back to writing, but to concentrating and back to blogging as you may see here.

So hopefully this will last and also don’t forget to check out my photography based blog which I am about to write an update for. You can reach it by clicking the images that I have posted below. And on that blog you will find clear ways to get a hold of me and also on following me on Twitter should you wish too, see you later.

I’ve never really been one for Dating.

I have never really been one for going on “dates” and generally I don’t go on them. Dates, to me, seem too false. You meet up with somebody and try to present yourself as an amazing person, witty, smart and fun to be around.

I usually compare people on dates to people who go for interviews for jobs that they don’t really want. You see these people being interviewed and they seem to present themselves as perfect for the role they have applied for. It’s only when you get them in the office/shop floor/wherever that you realised that all that time you invested in your new employee was actually wasted and they’re a bit of a dick that you can’t bare to be around for more than five minutes.

My own personal experience could be a big reason for my aversion to dating. As it goes, I was once on my way to a date and with about 5 minutes before I got to the pub where we said we were going to meet it suddenly occurred to me that I had no idea what her name was. At all. When I first met her I gave her a nickname and that’s what I called her. The date itself came about in strange circumstances. My boss had sent me out to get something for her and I had started talking to the lady behind the till [because I tend to be able to strike up conversation with anybody] and after purchasing the items for my boss was about to leave but was asked for my number. At that point in time I didn’t really want to give anybody my number. So, and I have felt slightly bad since, I gave her my fake number. And thought I got out of there ok, there was a short period where I thought I may have given her my real number but two weeks went by and I realised there were no phone calls or texts so I thought all to be well and that I had got away with my cruel misdead.

But nothing in life is that easy.

I had forgotten that during our chat, before I realised the road it had gone down, I had told here where it was that I had worked. Bad move. At the time I had worked in a very popular camera shop and a customer and his wife were in looking at binoculars. He picked up a pair and his wife said that she was going to look at another shop. And I thought that if he was going to play with binoculars I will too. So I picked up a pair and saw a blurry figure in the distance waving. So, me thinking it was the customers wife paid no mind [the customer and I were both looking in the same direction], but the blurry figure kept waving so I pulled it into focus and in a moment of terror I realised that it was that girl from the shop that I was looking at. And although it sounds like something from a terrible movie, I promise you it actually happened. The customer noting this said “Friend of yours?”. My reply being “Not exactly”.

So when she came into the shop and told me that she had tried the number and hadn’t been able to get through. So I feigned shock and surprise and she said that she was going to dial it and see if my phone went off. At that point I had to give her my actual number as she was standing there and I felt a little guilty [and needless to say cornered] because she had gone to all the trouble of tracking me down.

So, back to the date.

Girl [whose name to this day I cannot remember, the best I can tell you was that it started with either a J or K was late. Now this bugged me quite a bit, because I never like sitting in a pub by myself at the best of times and had to make friends with the people next to me. It’s easy enough done, but still hassle. She arrived and I still had no idea what to call her so I went with “Babe” and it worked well. But to be honest, throughout most of this date I just wanted to go home. I don’t know how people who date do it. Sitting there making small talk, trying not to make it to obvious that you’re bored witless.

Eventually [thank God] one of her friends came along and I managed to catch what her name was. That memory only lasted about 15 minutes.  And we met up with another of her friends. This guy, it was so obvious to tell that he liked “Babe” and she was totally oblivious. And he didn’t like me till I called him on it. With my trademark “So…How long have you fancied XX”. Looking stunned he admitted it was a long time. I really just wanted to go home.

It was later suggested that we went to a night club. I hate night clubs, and I really hated the night club we were going to. But I went, mainly because I had white trainers on and thought I wouldn’t be able to get in and could go round my friend’s house to watch some movies. As you have probably gathered I didn’t really have a romantic interest with this girl and I was kind of going along with it all. But, as I have said before in this post,

nothing in life is that easy.

He let me in! The bouncer who had been turning people away left right and centre let me in with jeans and white [muddy white] trainers. The night gets hazy from that point on but I remember [probably] kissing her and waking up at her house. Where I pulled out my patented ‘leave as early as possible’ manoeuvre. If I have slept round your house you know what I mean.

With this experience is it surprising that I don’t really go on dates. It seems so strange. For two people who barely [and in some cases don’t] know each other having to sit over dinner/movie/in a  bar and mandatorily be expect to have a good time in each others company. I swear that’s how they try and get pandas to mate, and it doesn’t work.

I’m sure there are worse stories of dating. A blog that I have recently started to read about dating is called – Book Editors You should check it out if funny
and a good read. Click the name above to go through to the blog.

This is the first post I have written for this blog in a long while and it’s kind of written in the style that I had lost, with which I had started this blog to begin with. It actually only came about because of a conversation I had today with a friend on mine as she was recounting her dating stories and this one just popped into my head. Well, hopefully you’ve enjoyed what you have read if you would like to see my photography blog feel free to click the link below.

Also feel free to add me on Twitter my onscreen name is: squarebrackets

[every line is about who I don’t wanna write about anymore]

It’s true.
I’m going to take a break from creative endeavours soon.
Photography wise I’ve been working pretty hard.
And I’m kind of burning myself out.

If you would like to see my photography blog please click the link below.
http://richardanthonymorris.wordpress.com/

And with regards to the title and the first line of this post.
I have found that all my poetry is very similar.
And so, I’m going to go back to square one.
With the photography and my writing.
Re-learn everything and hopefully start anew and emerge better than I was.
That is all.

[getting ready for the get gone]

Well it seems that the end for Bangor [in terms of
me being here] are looming ever closer. In just
over a week I’ll be leaving Bangor. Of course I’ll
return but it won’t be the same as I won’t be living
here.

At the moment as I sit in my room that is looking a little
more bare than it did last week. And it makes me think
of Scrubs for some strange reason. In particular the last
episode of Season 8 when JD leaves Sacred Heart. And how
he was goping for the massive goodbye. Which as we know
in life, doesn’t happen.

So, I pack my things, the majority of my things
anyways. I didn’t pack my cameras away as I have a
feeling that I may need to use any of them at any
given time. Yes, I am that geeky. For further
evidence of this look below.

The Cameras That I Have Left Out Just In Case

I know, awesome right?

I don’t have much else to write except that my jaw hurts
if I open it too wide which makes yawning and eating
quite painfull but at least my feet have healed and I’m
able to walk around without feeling epic pain 🙂

Also, not having a job is really fucking boring.

[reminds me of home]

Not sure where I found this or exactly how long it’s been saved on my computer.

But seeing it reminds me of home.

The fact that besides Bangor at the moment home is Kent and by weak extension London and that this drawing is obviously not of London makes the fact it reminds me quite strange. But there you go.

Hope you’re all good.

[one day I will own this city]

We’ll get married in the morning.
So if it doesn’t work out we wouldn’t have wasted the day.

[edit]

[people think an edit is just for text, they are wrong]

It is soon time to perform yet another edit on my life.
I have done it before, taken my life, looked it over, seen
what parts are not needed and removed them.

My attitude, demeanour and way of life is wrong.
Although it has led to an overwhelming confidence.
A sort of ‘don’t give a fuck view on life’ as it has been
described. And although this is a great way to live
[don’t get me wrong], it also leads to laziness in
achieving goals. A sort of  ‘wait and see’ that can go
on for months.

So what Im going to do is look at my life and adjust, a few
simple measures to make sure that life runs as it should.
A general action that one must goes through during an edit
is to look at your social network. Firstly your online social
network. This is your Facebook, Twitter, Myspace and so
on and seriously consider how many of your ‘friends’ or
‘followers’ you actually interact with. When you realise all
the ones you don’t, delete them. I have found that my
online social networks are riddles with crap on my behalf,
this will change as part of the edit.

Oh, and if they notice you have deleted them and
message you then you may have made a mistake
and should consider taking them back.

That’s the start of an edit and one of the easiest parts. Now
that you’ve done an erase you must now rearrange and
rework parts of yourself. Look at your best features and
keep those and the thing that you don’t like, get rid. For
instance, looking at myself, I’m not that bad at socialising
and ask anybody who knows me and they’ll know how
easy I can make friends. But I quite dislike my lack of
dedication towards a goal and how easy it is for me to
get distracted.

And after you’ve done all that, make a list of
actions, a list of rules that you will live by for
the next month or so, just to prove to yourself
that you have some form of willpower.

I’ve already done these for a month a few
times so I’ve decided that the rules below are going to
start soon [within the next two weeks] and carry on for
a year;

To only get drunk a maximum of once a week
To no longer eat of fast food [this rule is not applicable whilst drunk]
Increase my productivity
Do not waste time
Read more
Don’t just make plans

I’m hoping this edit will go well as it needs to be done
over some time to be successful. With this new way of
life I should be able to be more proactive in sorting
everything out including but not limited to my future
career.

Over and out.