Tag Archives: alcohol

I’ve never really been one for Dating.

I have never really been one for going on “dates” and generally I don’t go on them. Dates, to me, seem too false. You meet up with somebody and try to present yourself as an amazing person, witty, smart and fun to be around.

I usually compare people on dates to people who go for interviews for jobs that they don’t really want. You see these people being interviewed and they seem to present themselves as perfect for the role they have applied for. It’s only when you get them in the office/shop floor/wherever that you realised that all that time you invested in your new employee was actually wasted and they’re a bit of a dick that you can’t bare to be around for more than five minutes.

My own personal experience could be a big reason for my aversion to dating. As it goes, I was once on my way to a date and with about 5 minutes before I got to the pub where we said we were going to meet it suddenly occurred to me that I had no idea what her name was. At all. When I first met her I gave her a nickname and that’s what I called her. The date itself came about in strange circumstances. My boss had sent me out to get something for her and I had started talking to the lady behind the till [because I tend to be able to strike up conversation with anybody] and after purchasing the items for my boss was about to leave but was asked for my number. At that point in time I didn’t really want to give anybody my number. So, and I have felt slightly bad since, I gave her my fake number. And thought I got out of there ok, there was a short period where I thought I may have given her my real number but two weeks went by and I realised there were no phone calls or texts so I thought all to be well and that I had got away with my cruel misdead.

But nothing in life is that easy.

I had forgotten that during our chat, before I realised the road it had gone down, I had told here where it was that I had worked. Bad move. At the time I had worked in a very popular camera shop and a customer and his wife were in looking at binoculars. He picked up a pair and his wife said that she was going to look at another shop. And I thought that if he was going to play with binoculars I will too. So I picked up a pair and saw a blurry figure in the distance waving. So, me thinking it was the customers wife paid no mind [the customer and I were both looking in the same direction], but the blurry figure kept waving so I pulled it into focus and in a moment of terror I realised that it was that girl from the shop that I was looking at. And although it sounds like something from a terrible movie, I promise you it actually happened. The customer noting this said “Friend of yours?”. My reply being “Not exactly”.

So when she came into the shop and told me that she had tried the number and hadn’t been able to get through. So I feigned shock and surprise and she said that she was going to dial it and see if my phone went off. At that point I had to give her my actual number as she was standing there and I felt a little guilty [and needless to say cornered] because she had gone to all the trouble of tracking me down.

So, back to the date.

Girl [whose name to this day I cannot remember, the best I can tell you was that it started with either a J or K was late. Now this bugged me quite a bit, because I never like sitting in a pub by myself at the best of times and had to make friends with the people next to me. It’s easy enough done, but still hassle. She arrived and I still had no idea what to call her so I went with “Babe” and it worked well. But to be honest, throughout most of this date I just wanted to go home. I don’t know how people who date do it. Sitting there making small talk, trying not to make it to obvious that you’re bored witless.

Eventually [thank God] one of her friends came along and I managed to catch what her name was. That memory only lasted about 15 minutes.  And we met up with another of her friends. This guy, it was so obvious to tell that he liked “Babe” and she was totally oblivious. And he didn’t like me till I called him on it. With my trademark “So…How long have you fancied XX”. Looking stunned he admitted it was a long time. I really just wanted to go home.

It was later suggested that we went to a night club. I hate night clubs, and I really hated the night club we were going to. But I went, mainly because I had white trainers on and thought I wouldn’t be able to get in and could go round my friend’s house to watch some movies. As you have probably gathered I didn’t really have a romantic interest with this girl and I was kind of going along with it all. But, as I have said before in this post,

nothing in life is that easy.

He let me in! The bouncer who had been turning people away left right and centre let me in with jeans and white [muddy white] trainers. The night gets hazy from that point on but I remember [probably] kissing her and waking up at her house. Where I pulled out my patented ‘leave as early as possible’ manoeuvre. If I have slept round your house you know what I mean.

With this experience is it surprising that I don’t really go on dates. It seems so strange. For two people who barely [and in some cases don’t] know each other having to sit over dinner/movie/in a  bar and mandatorily be expect to have a good time in each others company. I swear that’s how they try and get pandas to mate, and it doesn’t work.

I’m sure there are worse stories of dating. A blog that I have recently started to read about dating is called – Book Editors You should check it out if funny
and a good read. Click the name above to go through to the blog.

This is the first post I have written for this blog in a long while and it’s kind of written in the style that I had lost, with which I had started this blog to begin with. It actually only came about because of a conversation I had today with a friend on mine as she was recounting her dating stories and this one just popped into my head. Well, hopefully you’ve enjoyed what you have read if you would like to see my photography blog feel free to click the link below.

Also feel free to add me on Twitter my onscreen name is: squarebrackets

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[i’m only here to let the world know]

It has been too long since I last wrote a post on here. Actually
to be honest I think that I haven’t written a post in this whole
month and as for my
photoblog it’s been even longer. This
shall be rectified tonight.

What to discuss though? Well I’m about to do an epic post that
will cover several topics which could probably have been
covered over a set number of posts.

*To make it easier to read instead of every other paragraph being in bold
format I will alternate between blod and not bold per topic in this post as
opposed to every other paragraph. Here goes.

As always I have  a new book idea, I had done some pretty extensive
work on the one I was writing some time ago [
click here to see the
first chapter
] but never took any notes with all the adjustments I had
made. The version I was working on was a completely re-worked
version. Different story lines brewing, different characters and in
my opinion much better written than the previous framework that
I had put up. But alas, that version died along with the Mac that it
was on. Ah well.

I have been doodling a few new ideas and I thinking of basing the
beginning of the new book on the blog entry [
it all started with a
newspaper
]. It seems like a good idea and it might work. I’m
probably never going to complete it. But my mind needs a focus
point and writing wise. This will be it  :]

Another writing outlet has been to keep my notepad up to date and
to start designing a magazine on InDesign. I was going to make a
magazine with photography and general bit’s and pieces and save
it as a PDF file and allow it for download from this site!

Aside from this I have been keeping my mind busy in other areas, for example,
the rest of my life. I have been drawing up a two year plan. One, that if followed
correctly, will set me on a course for the rest of my life. That’s right people I have
picked a career path that I want to undertake. I am not going to tell everyone
what it is. Only a few select people know what it is that I want to do, and I’m
comfortable with that. This plan is currently only part way complete. But I’m
confident in my ability not to fuck this up.

As some of you may know I love long journeys [providing I have a
book and my iPod]. And soon I’m about to embark on a set of
journeys which sees me doing about fourteen hours worth of
travel in three days. On this Thursday I will be travelling by bus
from Bangor to Aberystwyth for a night of drunken madness with
Stephanie Luff and Goog Hart. Getting drunk in a place I have never
been before is always a solid plan by the way.

Plus I like to see places I have never seen before. I am staying in
Aberystwyth overnight and in the morning catching a bus from
Aberystwyth to Cardiff the capital city of Wales to see my friend
Azita who I have featured on my
photoblog and of whom I’ve not
seen in ages. If you having trouble visualising this journey
I have included a map below.

As you can see, this isn’t a ‘small trip’ I am actually going from A to B
and Back Again. Meaning that I am going one one side of the country
to the other. The long way.

A is Bangor
B is Cardiff
And that little squiggly bit in the middle is Aberystwyth.

I should probably take two books, just in case.

Another thing that I mention in a previous post was the list of so many things
had to do before I died. This list isn’t complete but has already Sixty-One items
listed [if you would like to suggest an item to go on the list feel free]. Item
Twenty-Two was to visit a Zoo. As this was something that I had never done
before. So on the 25th Of February my friend Heather Torrance and I visited
the Colwyn Bay Zoo in Wales and it was awesome :] I really enjoyed it and I
took a photo [as this is one of the rules of the list ‘where possible retain
photographic proof’] So below is a photograph of the polaroid of Heather and I
with a Bear in the background [although hard to see, he is there, honest]

This photograph is taken in the same style as the Polaroid shot in the last
post. Mainly because I like to show the camera the photograph came from
and also because I really lack a scanner in Wales.

This was actually an awesome day. As well as seeing the Bears [yes, there
were two] I saw Camels, Penguins, Monkeys, Flamingos, Seals, Crocodiles,
Tigers, an Arctic Fox and all manner of animals that I had never actually
seen in real life.  Only in books or on television.

I’ve no idea why I had yet to visit a Zoo before that day. Then again I’ve
never been to an Ikea store yet either.

I hopefully should be getting visitors soon which will be
epic, as the last visitor I had [Andrew James Murrock]
I’m sure had an amazing time here :] plus I kind of enjoy
people visiting and me showing them around and what
not. I get to play host as well, which is a plus, haha.

The main reason that this post took forever to write was not it’s
length as this was written in one sitting [which I apologise if the
writing style is odd, but hey] was the fact that this is the 200th
post on this blog. THAT’S RIGHT THE 200TH!!!

Awesome yeah?

And as of writing this post this blog has had 13,094 views. So that’s
65.8 views for every post. That’s figure has been rounded down and
also doesn’t include this post as that wouldn’t make sense. I’m quite
surprised that I managed to keep this thing going. Even though there
were quite a few gaps.

Because this was the 200th post I didn’t want to write just
anything which meant that things kind of kept building up
and building up leading to this mega-post. Over 1000 words
as it seems. Oh, one more thing before I go, recently I have
started using my
Vimeo account alot more and posted these
videos on it. I have [hopefully] embedded three examples
below, hope you like.

Calm from Richard Anthony Morris on Vimeo.

For The Bird from Richard Anthony Morris on Vimeo.

Couldn’t Resist Recording The Escalator from Richard Anthony Morris on Vimeo.

Laters.
Over And Out.

[and these are the rules by which I play]

Ok so tonight has re-proved something that I
already knew, I should probably start the
story at the start.

I would describe myself as cheeky but with an underlying
sense or morals and decency that some would [and have]
define as being a gentlemen.

So this is why when a member of the opposite sex
is making a pass a few things need to taken into
consideration, the first is whether she has been
drinking and how much, if it is too much in
comparison to me, I would walk her to her friends
or walk her home to make sure she got back OK.

Secondly, you have to look into the eyes, it’s a strange thing
to just say as a sentence so I’ll put it into a scenario. I left
a local club called Time and on the walk home I put my music
in [it’s actually a two minute walk, but I love my music] and
without realising it I was singing the Simon & Garfunkel song
‘The Sound Of Silence’ and whilst walking noticed a shadow
walking astride mine. So I popped back the hood of my flatmates
jacket and saw a girl giving me a cute smile saying

“I really liked your singing by the way”

Without a hint of sarcasm [which is what you would have expected
had you heard my voice] and that when I noticed what was in her
eyes. It was what I usually have in mine which is a hint of
romantasism. I know it sounds strange but it is true.

And that’s why I said thank you for your compliment
and kindly made my way down my road, I don’t know
what it was but it was that hint in her eye that made
me think that she|

[ok as I’m writing this I’m finding it hard to put my thoughts
into words, which is annoying, so I’m leaving that part open
which sadly means that this part of the post is
non-conclusionary and for that I apologise]

What I must say though is that Mum must have
done a good job.

[the coolest t-shirt I have ever owned]

I present to you, the offensive shirt.

[a random wave, unexplained]

Today was quiz day, whoop, and I actually enjoy it
quite a bit. But today after my first drink of cider
and black a random wave came over me and mission
was to get drunk. I mean quite drunk.

I’m quite drunk at the moment being that it’s the
end of the night and I have consumed at least six
shots of sambuca and  also two and a half pints of
cider and black.

I’m actually drunk whilst writing this post and whilst
I am not so so drunk that I can’t use the keyboard
properly. I am drunk enough to know that my behavior
due to this ‘wave’ wasn’t normal. For one I was doing most
of the drinking at the bar and I also sat away from the group
which is unlike me, ah well, it’ll pass before the morning
comes. And now to reply to monster’s comment.

[of which I couldn’t really care about]

OK, so it has been an admitedly long time since my last post
and this is not through lack of trying as I have gone to write
things for this blog during time and just ended up closing the
tab without actually saving the draft of the hundred or so
words that I had just written. Which I guess is the digital
likeness of throwing paper in the bin after spending ages
trying  to write something. Although this is more eco-friendly.

And it’s not even confined to the post editor that WordPress gives
you. I have even been writing notes [very long notes] in my phone
which are the outlines of blog ideas and on one or two entire posts,
and it was while looking back through these notes that I saw one
that I decided I was actually going to write about. It wasn’t an entire
blog entry but only a title.

‘Getting Bored Of The Fact That The Only People I Kiss
Recently I Don’t Actually Care About’

And it’s true, for at least a couple of months now it seems that the
only people I’ve kissed or done anything with I have absolutely
no feelings towards in that sense. I don’t ‘nothing’ them, but I
don’t feel any spark. And that’s not to say I haven’t felt the spark
but nothing happens with those people. And trust me, constantly
kissing people you have no romantic connection to is very boring.

Another thing that seems to be happening more recently
than it  did before is the fact that I’d have to say about
80-90% of them I don’t even know there names and most
of those I find hard to envision their face in my mind. It
kind of reminds me of the Brand New song Millstone.  Ah
well, I am hoping this will change, but the point of this
post was just to write something, to be able to say to
myself that I was actually putting my thoughts and feelings
back into this blog. And I have. :]

In the meantime before I figure out what to write about next or
indeed how to word what it is I’ve already written [albeit in note
form] enjoy this photograph of my looking ridiculously happy in Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch, Wales.

Apart from what I mentioned above, it’s actually quite fun
here.

12445_326120620360_791560360_9539680_1068381_n

Yeah that’s right. Tourist as fuck.

[the ten rules to a party]

Now, I compiled this list a while ago when I realised
that most of the parties that I had previously [and
also to the date of me writing this] have had the same
set of occurrences.

Now [just to preface] this list isn’t exclusive to parties
but generally any gathering of people where alcohol is
involved. I would like to also say that it is quite rare
to see all ten things at once. But you will notice at least
two or three. Trust me. OK, so lets begin.

1] The Crying/Upset Girl She is the staple of the party
rules and actually the inspiration for the list. I recall
walking a girl home from one of my parties because she
was on the brink of becoming ‘The Crying Girl’. But as
it goes I find it hard to find it a party with the absence
of ‘The Crying Girl’

Alot of the time, she cries for little to no reason at all.
And like a few things on this list only happens for a
little bit of attention. Even if you think that you
avoided it at your party that just means that it most
likely happened in  a locked bathroom or bedroom.

But this rarely happens as the crying girl usually
feels the need to tell a few of her close friends. A
crying boy can happen but that is usually associated
with rule number ten.

2] The Stranger – This rule generally describes a
person who wasn’t really invited to the party. But
came along as a plus one or tagged along with a
friend and at some time during the night gets parted
from the person they came along with and for some
unknown reason decides to tag along with you. It
gets annoying.

3] The Pretender – This [in my experience] will most
of the time be a girl. She would have not had that much
to drink but just for the attention of the people around
her, she will appear alot more drunk than she actually is.
But she will only do this when there are people around.
Because what is the point of this ludicrous performance
if there is not an audience to witness it.

NB: In addition [and I have done this myself, if you look at
‘The Pretender’ when she believes that nobody is looking
she will be totally fine, and probably looking around to see
if there is anyone to act drunk around.

4] The Adulterer – For the purpose of the list I am
classing adultery as anything from a kiss and beyond,
[funny enough, my blog, my rules]. Alcohol will often
be used as an excuse to why the adultery occurred. Because
generally if you commit adultery at a party you will be
caught. But alcohol only lowers your inhibitions to things
that you may have done anyways. So therefore if you are
the one who committed the adultery then you can still
be blamed.

5] Storming Out – At some part during the night somebody
will get really drunk and decide upon themselves that it
would be agreat idea to walk home [when they can hardly
walk five metres in a straight line] regardless of how far they
live. And because you are nowhere near as drunk as they are
you try and stop them and that can actually take up alot of
your night. As terrible as it sounds, if somebody wants to walk
home, let them. They’ll only have themselves to blame.

6] Disappearing Act – Now this is different to the previous
rule. Mainly because with this rule the person will dissappear
without making a fuss. But will generally leave with a few
people and will not be totally wasted so you are rest assured
that even though they leave drunk they will be able to get
home safe.

7] The Drunk Text – Drunken texting is an illness, one that
I have suffered with for some time. The only way I can describe
why we do it, is that when we are drunk, we want people to
know that we are thinking about you [in a nice, non-creepy
way]. Although drunk texts are usually quite harmless I have
sent a few that have made me cringe when I remembered
sending them as I was recovering the next day. Ah well, as is
life.

8] Time To Have It Out – An argument will happen, between
a couple who are on the rocks or on the other hand a couple who
have recently broken up. Underlying or unresolved issues are
generally helped to break through to the surface by the consumption
of alcohol.It is best not get involved, because sometimes what’s
getting yelled out at the top of their lungs needs to come out.

9] House Party Rules – If you are having a house party there are
a few things that you should expect. Firstly, no matted how much
you prepare your home. Something will get broken or wrecked. One
or both of the two. And secondly somebody will be sick, a rule that is
so universal throughout partyland is that there will always be somebody
who does not know there limits when it comes to alcohol and pukes
up everywhere [this happens so often that it should have been rule
eleven to be honsest]. Also, it’s very annoying when it’s over YOUR stuff.

10] Boys Are Back In Town – When it comes to a party you will find
that the boy’s will get heated and try to be men by having a fight. This
rule isn’t just for the males, women have been known to break out into
random fights, it’s quite strange because it is completely counter-productive
to the party atmosphere.

Ah well, that’s it. Hope you enjoyed reading it. Comment if you
want, I have realised that I have been a bit slack with blog posts
recently so I’m trying to rectify this. In short, I will be blogging
more, from now on.

Wow, one thousand words. Whoop!