Monthly Archives: July 2009

[constans cacosomnia]

Now when I was informed that I would be
being made redundant. A few thoughts
crossed my mind. The obvious being that
it kinda sucks but another thought was that
my days would switch around again.

To put in basic terms, when I have no reason
to get up at a particular time, then the same
reasoning says that I don’t have to go to sleep
at a particular [or any] time. Which has now
resulted in my days becoming my nights
and my nights becoming my days. I go to
sleep at 6:00am and wake up at 3:00pm.

Now, it has it’s uses, as I find that I am
more productive at night. I’ve been reading
more and getting my bedroom wall covered
in photographs of friends and family. Past
and present. It’s nice.

But the trouble comes when I do need
to awake at a socially acceptable hour. Like
I have to on Wednesday. And I need to reverse
the affect on my internal body clock.

This is done by staying up all thorough one
night and only going to sleep at about 6:00pm
that day before you have to be anywhere. The
body [my body that is] generally sorts itself
out after that, and everything is OK. Except
that it is so much effort I might just risk
oversleeping to be honest.

The title of this blog, in case you were wondering
is Latin. And it roughly translates into ‘constant
sleeplessness. Quite fitting I felt.

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[1001 lessons in love and still none the wiser]

Life, is supposedly made up of lessons. Which
people generally called ‘Life lessons’. Now a
life lesson is supposed to arise from every
major experience in your life [some people
also believe even the tiny things are also
life lessons, but we’re going to stick to the
big stuff]. From every triumph and every
defeat, we, as people, are supposed to take
what we can from it and learn all that we
can.

Like for instance, going down a dark alley and
getting in a bit trouble, tells you to not to go
down dark alleys anymore, or having your heart
messed around with should show you how to be
able to recognise and avoid certain types of people
and the situations that they can bring, and so on
and so on.

But the thing about learning from the
mistakes you make in your life, it somehow
insinuates that you will suddenly [at some
undefined moment in your life] start living
mistake free. But, I have yet to see this
happen.

The reason for this blog stems from a drunken
conversation I had with my friend Simpson,
during which we discussed many things but
one of the topics that I continued to think about
the next morning [totally hangover free] was
that we had discussed how tired we were with
all these life lessons and just wanted things to
hurry and start properly without all the
messing around of having to have your head
[and your heart] messed around with.

The both of us had had enough [in
temperament  and quantity] of all these
life lessons that came along and trying
to figure exactly what it was that they
were ‘supposedly’ trying to teach us and
whether it was a different lesson every
time. Or whether we were just making
the same mistakes.

Maybe we were hoping for too much? You know?

It’s that old saying isn’t it? ‘Everything
happens for a reason’ and that ‘Good things
happen to those who wait’. These sayings
although widely used and antique in their
own sense are wrong. They just leave you
there accepting all the crap that happens
to you and waiting for something amazing
to just waltz into your life.

But as we all know, that just doesn’t happen.
It’s pretty shitty to be honest. Because
from what I’ve seen with the people around
me, the things that they want to just appear
out of the sky, were right in front of them the
whole time.

[so]

It’s my Jessops leaving do  on Sunday.
Having it at the Laughing Buddha in
Bexleyheath. And you know what I am
gonna get completely wasted. I’m not
being funny either.

I haven’t drank a drop of alcohol since about the
29th of May this year. So as Simpson said,

“If there’s an excuse to drink, then your own
leaving do has got to be one of them”

And she’s right. So if you get a random text
or phone call from me on Sunday night, best
to ignore it :]

[standing]

I’ve got all that I want
No need to complain
As you can see, I’ve made it.

But as I stand,
With the world at my feet
I wish I was loved by something.

[i’m in love with your daughter, i wanna have her babies]

Because when I got in from work today I
was stupid enough to get comfortable on
my bed and fell asleep for several hours.

So this meant that I wasn’t able to sleep
last night which is annoying as I’m up now
and I need to be at work in less than two hours,
so I thought that I would write a blog entry,
it has been a while. Hasn’t it?

First off, in regards to the previous post, and
for those that don’t know I started writing
a book when I was really bored in the
departure lounge of an airport and recently
found it again and placed the first chapter
on wordpress as a blog [the aforementioned
‘previous’ blog] and it got generally good
feedback. Apart from a few grammatical
mistakes, it was all good. If you’ve not read
it, please do and comment. I sent a message
on Facebook to my favourite author Mike Gayle
and he like it. So that was awesome. Only
annoying thing is that the second chapter
is terrible in comparasion so that needs alot
of re-writing.

I went to Facedown on Friday. Which is a
once monthly club night held in Scala in
Kings Cross in London. And I don’t think that
I’ll be going again for some time. And this
isn’t because I had a terrible time. It’s because
it was probably one of the best nights out
I have had in a long time. And I don’t think
I need to go out for a while because of how great
that night was, other nights won’t really be
able to compare.

I may have a part-time job sorted for when I leave
Jessops in less than two weeks.

I got Regina Spektor’s new album [that’s what
the title is about] and it’s actually pretty good.
I’ve had a quick listen to La Roux’s album and
also the new album by Jack Penate. Definite
buy’s for when I get some more money

I may have an actual website soon, but it’ll most
likely be a link site for my flickr and this blog and
so forth. And there you go, a four hundred word catch
up blog on what I have been up to recently.

I didn’t sleep last night, this feels odd. Although
the Sunrise this morning probably worth it. But
now I look outside it seems to be raining.