Monthly Archives: August 2008

[ever had a moment?]

So tonight I was on the cab home
[or rather in] and we were going
along, me drunkenly in the back
and the cab driver [obviously]
in the front seat telling me
about a previous passenger that
had annoyed him.

At this point we were at some
lights that had been red [albeit
only for a few seconds] where
I had to ask him to stop talking.
As rude as that was, it had to
done. Because, at those red
lights I came across something
quite rare.

Everything was still.
Everything was perfectly still.

This may not seem to be anything
of great astoundment to anybody
but you probably don’t understand
truly what I mean. Nothing was
moving, at all. There were no people
walking down the street, there were no
cars anywhere nearby and there was
no wind.

I looked upon the scene laid out
before me, strangely calmed by it.
Nothing would be moving, It’s
seemed eerily beautiful. And the
funny thing is that I know I haven’t
conveyed it in a way you will
understand, oh well. I’ll just try and
remember it for myself.

[This happy blog was requested
by Simpson, have fun]  =]

[who am i?]

Basic answer, I am Richard.
But by posing this question
on my blog, I’ve obviously
not come here to pose simple
questions towards you, but
to hopefully take this subject
a little deeper.

[And don’t worry, this isn’t
a self-indulgent blog to try
and make myself feel better]

Fine, go.

The need to question who we
are and what we are doing
generally stems from needing
to gauge a comparasion, a
comparasion between where
you are and where you want to
be. It [along with most human
acts in my opinion] is
ultimately healthy. It allows us
to see how far away from our
goals we are.

Although, like all things that can
be considered good, there can be
a point where things mess up, if
you question where you are and
what your doing to often. Then
you realise that the more often
you check up on your life, the
greater the increments appear
to be.

[It kinda runs on the same theory
of time seeming to slow when you
constantly check your watch]

Now as you sit there [wherever you may be],
and not necessarily now, but in the not too
distant future. Taking valuable stock of the |
place that you are currently in, your station
in life if you prefer. You must consider the
last time you took stock and how far you have
come since then, towards your goal, towards
your dream.

Because dreams don’t have to be unattainable,
just because they’re named after those strange
visions you see when your asleep doesn’t make
them any less real. Most peoples dreams are
[and this can be alot of the time] subject to
change due to some unforeseen event. But
no matter how they change they are still there
acting as the drive behind most of your
decisions. Make them the good ones.

[views on heartbreak]

Totally worth it.

No, seriously.

The way I see it, its an essential part
of human emotional growth, and
without it I don’t think that many
of the well-adjusted people that
you see from day to day would be
who they are.

And like most people I have experienced
this myself [I can’t say that it has equaled
to the tales I have heard from my
contemporarys], but yeah, it hurt, but, I
am [in a strange round-a-bout way]
appreciative of the experience. Experience
helps you grow stronger and allows
you to deal with situations with a level head.

Now I am not saying that I would like to
experience heartache again, but you see
thats the thing.

No matter how many times
you go through heartache for the last
time, your bound to go through it again.
It’s called life and like I said before it
worth it, because if something had the
ability to break your heart. It must have
been awesome to begin with.

True Story.

[placing a lid on the past]

In life you find that there are times
that in retrospect everything suddenly
becomes clear to you. You look back
and realise that you were blind to
that one piece of the puzzle that
eluded you whilst being right there
in your face the whole time.

And then, you have times like this
where the situation is so clear it
hurts. Something big is going to
happen, but I’m not sure what.
I do have reasons for this, it’s
not random precognition, the
signs are all about.

Now over the past months my mind
was still set back in Bromley, and
although I have more than a slight
distaste for the place. It was the catylyst
for some of the major events of my
life in recent years.

It’s where I got my first photography
related job [Jessops]. It’s also where
I met people that had a massive and
profound impact on my life. But, I have
realised that for some reason things are
slowly disappearing from the Bromley

The apologies I’ve received from my
exes and also the fact that one of my best
friends [that I met in Bromley if you hadn’t
figured the connection] is moving out
of London.

It seems like the past is being placed
behind me and ushering something


[something to live by]

[one day it will all become awesome]

As people we spend alot of time waiting.
Waiting for that perfect life or romantic
situation to appear. The thing about
waiting is that you hardly find yourself
risking anything.

Most of the good things in life, or the
good things that happen in life or
have happened are the direct result
of taking a chance.

Now, I’m not talking, the rolling of
a dice chance, I’m talking about
taking that chance that scares you.
Usually, the more it scares you
the greater the rewards. And if
you take the time to think about
it, you’ll realise I’m right.

So why are people stuck in a rut?

Why when what I just said is
common knowledge are people
seeming to be taking less and
less chances these days. The
answer for this?

Fear of consequence my dears,
fear of consequence.

It’s a shitty truth, but it is a truth
none the less, and as I sit here
in front of my laptop I wonder why
I myself am in said rut and what
I am gonna do to get out of it.

Fuck all is what I’m gonna do,
at least for the moment, life is
OK, and I have no reason to change
it, but, saying this I am liable
to do something soon. All because
of a Bloc Party lyric. As silly as
it sounds. The lyrics is from the
song called ‘Waiting For The 7:18’

“If I could do it again, I’d make more
mistakes, I’d not be so scared of
falling. If I could do it again I’d
climb more trees, I’d pick and I’d
eat more wild, blackberries”

I don’t wanna feel like that when
I’m thirty.

[words of wisdom|Rick Graham]